Chris McCann, the founder of the fringe Christian group eBible Fellowship, says the world is going to end on October 7, 2015. He confidently claims that the Earth will be completely “annihilated.” Could he be right?

According to McCann, God “shut the door to heaven” on May 21, 2011. And ever since, He has just been preparing to blow up our puny little planet. But that doesn’t mean McCann isn’t hedging his bets.

“There’s a strong likelihood that this will happen,” McCann told The Guardian. “Which means there’s an unlikely possibility that it will not.”

An unlikely possibility that it will not? What kind of half-assed doomsday preacher are you? If you’re going to hedge, don’t go twisting your words in knots. Also, it’d be nice if you could give us an estimated time and time zone for this October 7th date. It’s already October 7th in Sydney, Australia and I have yet to see any news reports about seven-headed beasts or the mass gnashing of teeth.

If you’d like to follow along while the world ends on Wednesday, you can listen to the eBible Fellowship’s audio webcast. Curiously, they still have a schedule up for October 8th and the days following that.

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As you’re probably aware, doomsday predictions about the end of the world date back to when humans first started writing shit down. But could McCann and his followers be right this time? Anybody who thinks he might be is welcome to PayPal me their life’s savings, since Jesus said he doesn’t let rich people into heaven–that whole camel passing through the eye of a needle thing.

You can never be too careful.

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